Tina cuts Mother Marjoram's hair

 

 

Mother Marjoram wanted to start the New Year with a new look. When she’d finally sobered up after the Solstice celebrations and made the long, reflective climb upstairs to the bathroom, she caught sight of herself in the mirror and realised she looked decidedly scruffy. There were wisps where there should have been structure, and structure where no one had ever asked for it. Something had to be done.

So she asked Tina for help. Tina is the local hairdresser — the sort who comes round to your house with her own scissors, strong opinions, and a commendable level of confidence, and has long been known to favour decisive action coupled with a complete disregard for personal boundaries. She has been known to say things like “Trust me” and “It’ll grow out” in the same breath, which should really be a warning.

Anyway, the upshot is that Mother Marjoram now has a pudding bowl cut. A proper one. The sort that suggests either a lost bet or a brief but intense encounter with kitchenware. The village is currently avoiding contact with her, as no one can keep a straight face. Even the postman is pretending to be very busy at the gate.

It is hoped that by Easter things may have improved. Or at least that everyone will have regained their composure.